Home article 10 Ways To Show Your Parents You’re Trustworthy

10 Ways To Show Your Parents You’re Trustworthy

10 Ways To Show Your Parents You’re Trustworthy

Teenagers can often be heard wondering why their parents are so mean and don’t trust them. Parents can’t help but wonder why their teens seem to lie all the time and can’t do what they’re supposed to do. This dynamic is one that plays out over and over, with no end in sight. Something different has to happen in order for this dance to change. If you’re a teen that wants to gain the trust of your parents, here are ten ways to show your parents that you are mature, responsible, and worthy of their trust.

  1. Turn in all of your homework on time. Do it all to the best of your ability. Do not forget to finish it, do not forget to turn it in, and make sure you always know what the assignments are and when they are due. These are important life skills, and by demonstrating you can handle this to your parents, you are showing them that you’re organized, on top of things, understand expectations, and are capable of meeting them.
  2. Be where you say you will be, and with whom you say you will be with. In other words, tell the truth. If you routinely tell the truth about whom you’re with and where you will be, your parents will trust that you are deserving and able to manage the privilege of going out with your friends. I know too many teens that lie about who they’re out with or where they’re going. Unfortunately, they almost always get caught, and then wonder why their parents don’t trust them.
  3. Respect your curfew. Whether you agree with it or not, you must treat the curfew with seriousness. In many states, young drivers have legal curfews. But parents are also allowed to dictate a curfew any time you leave the house. Be home on time, even a few minutes early. If there is any reason at all that you might be even one minute late, call ahead, out of respect, to let your parents know. This doesn’t mean you still might not have to deal with a consequence of being late, but at least your parents will know that you’re not dead in the road somewhere. The more you respect the curfew, and communicate with your parents, the more freedom they will give you.
  4. Wake yourself up in the morning and be ready to leave for school on time. That includes having all your school materials packed up and ready to go, eating breakfast, tidying up your room and making your bed, being showered and dressed, and anything else that is expected of you in the morning. You’re not a baby anymore. If your mom still needs to wake you and make your breakfast and pack your lunch like she did when you were little, then you are not demonstrating maturity or responsibility.
  5. Treat your parents with the respect and authority that they deserve. Put your phone away when they are talking to you. Don’t give nasty, argumentative, or sarcastic answers. Suck it up and learn how to be pleasant, even if you have to fake it. Follow through with whatever is they are asking of you, whether it’s taking out the trash, cleaning up your room, helping with dishes, or whatever else they might need you to do. Most teens spend more time arguing about doing the task than it would actually take to complete the task itself. Think about it. If you just suck it up and do it, you waste less time and you make your parents happy, which is really a win-win situation. We all know that happy parents make for happier teens.
  6. Do the things you know you’re supposed to do without being asked. When you are asked to do something, do it immediately, the first time you are asked. If you don’t like nagging, consider that your parents don’t like feeling that they have to nag you in order for something to get done.
  7. Don’t lie. Ever. Don’t lie about school, don’t lie about chores, don’t lie about being with your friends, and don’t lie about your whereabouts. For one thing, most teens get caught at least 50% of the time, and that means trouble and mistrust. More importantly, if you need to lie, you are not leading the life of a mature and responsible individual. If you were, you’d be making good choices, the truth itself would be satisfying, and there would be no behaviors that needed to be covered up with lies.
  8. Own your mistakes. Whether you get caught lying, forgot to turn in school work, or missed your curfew, take responsibility for your own actions. Don’t try to make excuses or blame others. Don’t say that everyone else did it, too. I can assure you your parents really don’t care about anyone else’s choices. Blaming others is literally the polar opposite of demonstrating maturity and responsibility.
  9. When you have a disagreement with your parents, when you don’t see eye to eye, spare the drama and the emotional outbursts. Discuss any issues calmly and rationally, all the while understanding that ultimately, your parents to get the final say on any and all issues, and you must respect that. I can tell you that they are far more likely to listen and understand your perspective if you are not yelling or crying or cursing at them. When they understand your perspective, they are more likely to be flexible in their rules, boundaries, or decisions.
  10. Be a good person. Convince your parents with your actions and behaviors that you are genuinely a good person. Every parent’s goal is to raise their children to become good people, good adults. If you show respect, care for others, and tend to do the right thing, more often than not, your parents will know that you are a good person. This will help them believe that they have done a good job of raising you and shaping you into a mature, responsible, caring and wise individual. Nothing will make them happier.
Lori Freson Lori Freson is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Southern California. She has been working in the mental health field since 1997, and has been a licensed therapist since 2002. Lori currently works in her own thriving private practice in Encino and Sherman Oaks, where she serves the San Fernando Valley and Los Angeles areas.
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